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Book 1 Unit 8 Fable of the Lazy Teenager

Book 1 Unit 8 Fable of the Lazy Teenager
Book 1 Unit 8 Fable of the Lazy Teenager

Fable of the Lazy Teenager

Benjamin Stein

1 One day last fall, I ran out of file folders and went to the drugstore to buy more. I put a handful of folders on the counter and asked a teenage salesgirl how much they cost. "I don't know," she answered. "But it's 1

2 cents each."

2 I counted the folders. "Twenty-three at 12 cents each, that makes $ 2.76 before tax,"I said.

3 "You did that in your head?" she asked in amazement. "How can you do that?"

4 "It's magic," I said. <>

5 "Really?" she asked.

6 No modestly educated adult can fail to be upset by such an experience. While our children seem better-natured than ever, they are so ignorant -- and so ignorant of their ignorance -- that they frighten me. In a class of 60 seniors at a private college where I recently taught, not one student could write a short paper without misspellings. Not one.

7 But this is just a tiny slice of the problem. The ability to perform even the simplest calculations is only a memory among many students I see, and their knowledge of world history or geography is nonexistent.

8 chilling indifference about all this ignorance. The attitude was summed up by a friend's bright, lazy 16-year-old son, who explained why he preferred not to go to U.C.L.A. "I don't want to have to compete with Asians," he said. "They work hard and know everything."

9 In fact, this young man will have to compete with Asians whether he wants to or not. He cannot live forever on the financial, material and human capital accumulated by his ancestors. At some point soon, his intellectual laziness will seriously affect his way of life. It will also affect the rest of us. A modern industrial state cannot function with an idle, ignorant labor force. Planes will crash. Computers will jam. Cars will break down.

10 To drive this message home to such young Americans, I have a humble suggestion: a movie, or TV series, dramatizing just how difficult it was for the country to get where it is -- and how easily it could all be lost. I offer the following fable.

11 As the story opens, our hero, Kevin Hanley 1990, a 17-year-old high school senior, is sitting in his room, feeling bitter. His parents insist he study for his European history test. He wants to go shopping for headphones for his portable CD player. The book he is forced to read -- The Wealth of Nations -- puts him to sleep.

12 Kevin dreams it is 1835, and he is his own great-great-great-grandfather at 17, a peasant in County Kerry, Ireland. He lives in a small hut and sleeps next to a pig. He is always hungry and must search for food. His greatest wish is to learn to read and write so he might get a job as a clerk. With steady wages, he would be able to feed himself and help his family. But Hanley's poverty allows no leisure for such luxuries as going to school. Without education and money, he is powerless. His only hope lies in his children. If they are educated, they will have a better life.

13 Our fable fast-forwards and Kevin Hanley 1990 is now his own great-grandfather, Kevin Hanley, 1928. He, too, is 17 years old, and he works in a steel mill in Pittsburgh. His father came to America from Ireland and helped build the New York City subway. Kevin Hanley 1928 is far better off than either his father or his grandfather. He can read and write. His wages are far better than anything his ancestors had in Ireland.

14 Next Kevin Hanley 1990 dreams that he is Kevin Hanley 1945, his own grandfather, fighting on Iwo Jima against a most determined foe, the Japanese army. He is always hot, always hungry, always scared. One night in a foxhole, he tells a friend why he is there: "So my son and his son can live in peace and security. When I get back, I'll work hard and send my boy to college so he can live by his brains instead of his back."

15 Then Kevin Hanley 1990 is his own father, Kevin Hanley 1966, who studies all the time so he can get into college and law school. He lives in a fine house. He has never seen anything but peace and plenty. He tells his girl friend that when he has a son, he won't make him study all the time, as his father makes him.

16 At that point, Kevin Hanley 1990 wakes up, shaken by his dream. He is relieved to be away from Ireland and the steel mill and Iwo Jima. He goes back to sleep.

17 When he dreams again, he is his own son, Kevin Hanley 2020. There is gunfire all day and all night. His whole generation forgot why there even was law, so there is none. People

pay no attention to politics, and government offers no services to the working class.

18 Kevin 2020's father, who is of course Kevin 1990 himself, works as a cleaner in a factory owned by the Japanese. Kevin 2020 is a porter in a hotel for wealthy Europeans and Asians. Public education stops at the sixth grade. Americans have long since stopped demanding good education for their children.

19 The last person Kevin 1990 sees in his dream is his own grandson. Kevin 2050 has no useful skills. Machines built in Japan do all the complex work, and there is little manual work to be done. Without education, without discipline, he cannot earn an adequate living wage. He lives in a slum where there is no heat, no plumbing, no privacy and survives by searching through trash piles.

20 In a word, he lives much as Kevin Hanley 1835 did in Ireland. But one day, Kevin Hanley 2050 is befriended by a visiting Japanese anthropologist studying the decline of America. The man explains to Kevin that when a man has no money, education can supply the human capital necessary to start to acquire financial capital. Hard work, education, saving and discipline can do anything. "This is how we rose from the ashes after you defeated us in a war about a hundred years ago."

21 "America beat Japan in war?" asks Kevin 2050. He is astonished. It seems as impossible as Brazil defeating the United States would sound in 1990. Kevin 2050 swears that if he ever has children, he will make sure they work and study and learn and discipline themselves. "To be able to make a living by one's mind instead of by stealing," he says." That would be a miracle."

22 When Kevin 1990 wakes up, next to him is his copy of The Wealth of Nations. He opens it and the first sentence to catch his eye is this: "A man without the proper use of the intellectual faculties of a man is, if possible, more contemptible than even a coward."

23 Kevin's father walks in. "All right, son," he says. "Let's go look at those headphones."

24 "Sorry, Pop," Kevin 1990 says. "I have to study."

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