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七年级下册第三单元写作

七年级下册第三单元写作
七年级下册第三单元写作

第三单元

单元写作写人要抓住特点

学习目标

1.学习描写目光的方法,养成修改作文的习惯。

2.细心观察,在目光中品出情味;生动描绘,在平淡中写出神采。

学习过程

一、反思习作

将自己写作《的目光》时的心得和疑惑总结一下写在下面。

二、描绘目光

1.请大家根据电影《长江七号》的片段,仔细观察人物的目光与表情,把片段中最打动你心灵的一缕目光描写出来,80字以内。

2.仔细观察右侧俄国大作家列夫·托尔斯泰的肖像,写一段文字描绘他的目光。

3.阅读下面的文字,与自己的片段描写相比较,你收获了哪些写作“目光”的经验呢?

只见面前的小个子那对浓似灌木丛的眉毛下面,一对灰色的眼睛射出一道黑豹似的目光……这道目光就像一把锃亮的钢刀刺了过来,又稳又准,击中要害,令你无法动弹,无法躲避。仿佛被催眠术控制住了,你只好乖乖地忍受这种目光的探寻,任何掩饰都抵挡不住。它像枪弹穿透了伪装的甲胄,它像金刚刀切开了玻璃。在这种入木三分的审视之下,谁都没法遮遮掩掩。

(茨威格《列夫·托尔斯泰》)

三、读懂目光

那是一个小西洋人,白种的孩子,十一二岁光景,白中透红的面颊,眼睛上有着金黄的长睫毛,显出和平与秀美。这可爱的小孩,引我久长的注意……我两次三番地看那白种的孩子,小西洋人!

但看了不几回,那父亲站起来了,儿子也站起来了,他们将到站了。这时意外的事来了。那小西洋人本坐在我的对面;走近我时,突然将脸尽力地伸过来了,两只蓝眼睛大大地睁着,那好

看的睫毛已看不见了;两颊的红也已褪了不少了。和平、秀美的脸一变而为粗俗、凶恶的脸了!他的眼睛里有话:“咄!黄种人,黄种人,你——你看吧!你配看我!”他已失了天真的稚气,脸上满布着横秋的老气了!

——选自朱自清《白种人——上帝的骄子!》

1.朱自清从这个“白种”孩子的目光里读出了什么?

2.他用了一个怎样的句子表达出自己对目光的解读?

四、写作实践

我们收藏着来自历史、来自自然、来自生活、来自人群的各种各样的目光。它们如水,如雪,如月,如细雨,如炉火……

那么,就让我们运用本课所学的写作方法,把你记忆深处的那一缕目光,描绘得更细腻更动人,力争写出你的独特解读和感悟。200字左右。

参考答案

一、反思习作

示例:我感觉自己叙述的故事太多,不知道该怎么写目光才细致,总感觉有些偏题。

二、描绘目光

1.略。

2.略。

3.示例1:他抓住目光的特点,运用比喻进行描写,如“一把锃亮的钢刀”,细致地描绘出目光“又稳又准”的特点,让人感觉很真切。

示例2:茨威格的这段描写目光的文字,运用了比喻、夸张等手法,既突出了托尔斯泰目光的犀利,又把他对人物的崇敬、赞美之情表达得尽情尽兴、酣畅淋漓。

三、读懂目光

1.傲慢、鄙视、偏见、侮辱、践踏等。

2.用“他的眼睛里有话……”的句式。

四、写作实践

例文:

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我每次看到老师的眼睛,都有一种感觉,老师的眼睛在说话。当我上课精力不集中开小差时,抬头看老师,老师总用批评的眼光看着我;当我上课不发言时,老师总用鼓励的眼光看着我,于是我便紧锁眉头,冥思苦想起来!

我最怕看见陆老师的眼睛,每当我作文写不好时我就不敢抬头,不敢看那双眼睛。前不久的一个上午,我和几个同学的作文不符合要求,放学后被留了下来。陆老师让我们站成一排,对我们的作文作评论;当我抬头时,我的目光与老师的目光相遇,发现那目光在说话:“你的作文写得很不好,下次不能这样!”

下午的上课铃声响了,是作文指导课。我坐直了身子,陆老师精神抖擞,向我们推荐了几篇好作文,她那清脆的朗读声,在教室里回荡……

陆老师的眼睛雪亮,上课很有精神,每当我做错题她总用询问的目光看着我,为我惋惜……一次我改正了错题,陆老师用赞许的目光看着我,我没有吭声,只是低着头,但心里美滋滋的……

老师的眼睛会说话:有时是埋怨,有时是惋惜,有时是批评,有时是鼓励,可有时却又十分神秘……它时时刻刻提醒着我们要不断努力……

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It was a little difficult.On Saturday night, I visited my aunt.My aunt cooked dinner for me.On Sunday morning, I went to the library.I read a book about history.Then in the afternoon,I played soccer with my friends.On Sunday night, I watched TV.I saw an interesting talk show . That was my weekend,I like my weekend . 4·My Family I have a big family. There are seven people in my family: My grandmother and grandfather. They live with us ,but now they are very old and can’t do anything. They rested at home. My father, my mother, my sister, my brother and I. My father is a worker. My mother is an English teacher. They are all work hard. My sister is eighteen and my brother is sixteen. I’m fourteen. We are in the same school. We are all study hard. This is my family. I like it very much. Can you tell me something about your family? 5·My (good) Friend Everyone has friends. I have a lot of friends.I think Xiong hong is my best friend. He is a Chinese boy. He is twelve. He is a nice boy. He has two big eyes and a small nose. There is always a sweet smile on his face. He is helpful. He is always helps others. Xiong Hong is my classmate. He is one of the best students in our class. Now he is the monitor of our class. He and I like sports. This is my friend. I like him very much. Do you like him? 6·My Teacher There are many teachers in my life , but the teacher I love best is my English teacher. Mr zhao is a good man. He is kind and friendly to me, he likes animals and playing basketball , his favorite food is fruit , he looks like / is tall and thin, he can speak English very well, I like having his class very much , I think study English is interesting , so I can study English well, ,I want to be a teacher ,too . Thank you , teacher .Best wishes for you . 7·My Summer Vacation Summer vacation will come soon , I have a plan for my summer vacation . First , I must do my home work , read some books . Second , I want to visit my grandparents, I miss them very much . Third , I will help my mother do some housework . Fourth, I will have a trip with my parents , we will go to Beijing about 1 week . I hope we will have a good time . This is my plan about my summer vacation. 8·My favorite animal My favorite animal is dog , because the dog is friendly and cute . There is a beautiful dog in my family . Her name is Huang Huang . It is my good friend . It is very smart . It likes playing with me . It often meet me at the door when I go home in the afternoon . I do my homework , it is often under my chair . After dinner , I always go for a walk with it . I love Huang Huang very much . 9·I want to be a doctor I want to be a doctor when I grow up. Do you know why ? When I was a little child, I was ill at times. So my mother often took me to see the doctor. In the hospital I saw the doctors how to help patients(病人). They were very kind and friendly. They made them healthy. So I always think when I grow up, I want be a doctor and help the other people. 10·The weather in my hometown My hometown is a beautiful city and the weather is beautiful too .It is not too hot in summer or too cold in winter . My hometown often has sunny days. The flowers come out not only in spring and summer but also in autumn and winter . The weather in my hometown is always warm . If you come to my hometown , you will like it. Welcome to my hometown 11·A Letter to My English Teacher Dear Miss Li, Thanks for you teaching us so well. I like your class very much. Your class is lovely and interesting. You are very friendly to us. When I have problems, you always help me. I miss you very much. I hope everything goes well with you and your family. I will study hard next year. I hope you can help me with my English as usual.(向往常一样)) Best wishes! Yours Lucy 12·Introduce Myself My name is Mary. I’m 11. I am a girl. I’m a Chinese. I’m in Class Eighty_ two, Grade One. I study very well. I have two friends. They are Lucy and Lily. Miss Li is our English teacher. I love her very much. Every day, I go to school at 6:00 am. Then I have breakfast at 7:30. I go to bed at 9:30. I like sports. I like to play games and I like to read, too. It’s me. I am a friendly girl. It’s me. Do you like me?

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