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英语小笑话带翻译简短

英语小笑话带翻译简短
英语小笑话带翻译简短

英语小笑话带翻译简短

我特意提前给他打电话,“提醒他我们将光临。

但是当我们来到宿舍时,他的房间凌乱不堪,我非常吃惊。

“忘了我们要来,是吧?我取笑他。

"are you kidding?" he replied, "why else would i have bothered to clean?"“开什么玩笑?,他回答说,“要不我凭什么费神打扫?简短英语小笑话带翻译篇二a shoplifter(商店扒手) was caught red-handed trying to steal a watch from a jewelry store. "listen," said the shoplifter, "i know you don't want any trouble either. what do you say i just buy the watch, and we forget about this?"一个小偷在一家珠宝店企图偷走一只手表的时候被当场擒获。

“听着,小偷说,“我知道你们也不想惹麻烦。

我把这只表买下,然后我们就当什么也没发生,你看怎样?the manager agreed and wrote up the sales slip. the crook(骗子,坏蛋) looked at the slip and said, "this is a little more than i intended to spend."经理表示同意,然后列了一张售货单。

小偷看着单子说道:“这比我最初的预算稍稍高了一点,你们还有没有便宜一点儿东西。

"

then mr. johnson said, "please, give me the good news first."强森先生说:“请先告诉我好消息吧!so the doctor said, "the doctors here are

going to name an incurable disease after you."医生说:“本院的医师决定用你的名字,来为一种不治之症命名。

简短英语小笑话带翻译篇四when a group of women got on the car, every seat was already occupied. the conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep, and fearing he might miss his stop, he nudged(用肘轻推) him and said: "wake up, sir!"当一群妇女上车之后,车上的座位全都被占满了。

售票员注意到一名男子好象是睡着了,他担心这个人会坐过站,就用肘轻轻地碰了碰他,说:“先生,醒醒!"i wasn't asleep," the man answered.“我没有睡着。

那个男人回答。

"not asleep? but you had your eyes closed."“没睡着?可是你眼睛都闭上了呀?"i know. i just hate to look at ladies standing up beside me in a crowded car."“我知道,我只是不愿意看到在拥挤的车上有女士站在我身边而已。

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Our co-worker went missing for a few hours, and we tore up the place looking for him. The boss finally found him fast asleep. Rather than wake him, he quietly placed a note on the man's chest. "As long as you're asleep," it read, "you have a job. But as soon as you wake up, you're fired." 中文: 我的同事有好几小时不见人了。我们疯了地到处找他。最后老板发现,他正在睡大觉。没叫醒他,老板悄无声息地在我的同事的胸前放了个纸条。“睡觉时”,条上写着,“你是我的员工,醒来你就不是了 1)TOM'S EXCUSE Teacher: Tom, why are you late for school every day? Tom: Every time I come to the corner, a sign says, "School-Go Slow". 汤姆的借口 老师:汤姆,您为什么每天上学迟到? 汤姆:我每次路过拐角,一个路标上面写着:"学校----慢行。" A man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?" and God says: "A penny", then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?" and God says: "a second", then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?" and God says "In a second" 一男子进入教堂和上帝对话.他问:"主啊, 一百万美元对你意味着多少?"上帝回答:"一便士."男子又问:"那一百万年呢?"上帝说:"一秒钟."最后男子请求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士吗?"上帝回答:"过一秒钟." Mother sent Tommy to the store across the street to buy a good box of matches. When Tommy came back, mother asked him,” Did you buy a good box of matches?” “Yes,Mum.”Tommy replied,”I have tried them all.” 一盒小火柴 妈妈让汤米去马路对面的商店里买一盒好用的火柴。汤米回来后,妈妈问他,“你买的是好用的火柴吗?” “是的,妈妈。”汤米回答,“我把它们都试过了。” )Father:Uh,oh,I think I just made an illegal right-hand turn. Susie:That is okay ,dad,the policeman behind you just did the same thing! 开车 父亲:哎呀,我刚才违规右转弯了。 苏西:没事,爸,跟在你后面的警察也这么转了。 )Little Robert asked his mother for tow cents.”What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?” “I gave it to a poor old woman,”he answered.

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有关经典英语小笑话爆笑|20个英语笑话爆笑超短 笑话作为一种城市化的民间口头创作体裁,是一种重要的交际手段。笑话带来的幽默感可以让我们交到更多的朋友。小编分享有关爆笑经典英语小笑话,希望可以帮助大家! 有关爆笑经典英语小笑话:Good News and Bad News The soldiers had been marching and fighting, they were dirty, hot and tired. One day, the general announced: “My men, I have some good news and some bad news for you. Which one would you like first?” ”The good news!” they all shouted. ”OK,” said the General. “The good news is that you will each be receiving a complete change of clothing.” ”Hurrah!” chorused the soldiers. ”And now for the bad news. Jack, you will change with John. John, you will change with Tom. Tom, you will change with Robert. Robert .... 好消息和坏消息 士兵们连续的行军,作战,他们又累又热又脏。一天,将军宣布: “士兵们,我有一些好消息和坏消息要告诉你们。你们愿意先听哪个呢?” “好消息!”他们嚷道。 “好吧,”将军说,“好消息就是你们每个人都可以彻底的换一身 衣服。” “乌拉!”士兵们高兴地大叫起来。 “现在呢,该是坏消息了。杰克,你将和约翰换衣服,约翰,你和汤姆 换,汤姆,你和罗伯特换,罗伯特……”有关爆笑经典英语小笑话:Help! Doctor! Help! Doctor! Please come quickly! ”My ten-year-old son has just swallowed a pen!” ”Ok , I’ll be right there. I’ll be there in 10 to 20 minutes.” ”Good,but....what am I supposed to do in the meantime?” ”Just use another pen!” 急诊 “唉!医生!你赶快来! 我那个十岁的小孩刚刚吞下去一支笔!” “喔!我马上过去,大概十分钟或二十分钟就会到了!” ”是,不过在.....在这个中间我该怎么办呢?” “用别的笔嘛!”有关爆笑经典英语小笑话:Do What You Can Originally in English In a courtroom, the judge sentenced a criminal to thirty years in prison and the prisoner said, “But Sir, I won’t live that long!” So the judge replied, “Don’t worry; just do what you can!” 尽力而为就好 在法庭上,法官宣判某个罪犯要服三十年徒刑。 犯人说:「不过庭上,我活不了那么久啊!」 法官说:「别担心!你尽力而为就好。」

英语幽默笑话带翻译新精编版

英语幽默笑话带翻译新 GE GROUP system office room 【GEIHUA16H-GEIHUA GEIHUA8Q8-

英语幽默笑话带翻译 1:A man was hit by a cab in the street. He was brought to the hospital. His wife who was standing up by his bed, said to the doctor: "I think that he is very ill." "I am afraid that he is dead." said the doctor, Hearing this, the man moved his head and said: "I'm not dead. I'm still alive." "Be quiet, "said the wife. "the doctor knows better than you!" 医生懂得多 一个男人在街上被出租车撞倒送进了医院.他的妻子站在他的床前对医生说:"我想他伤得很厉害."医生说:"我怕他已经死了."听到医生的话,这个男人转动着头说:"我没死,我还活着."妻子说:"安静,医生比你懂得多." 2:You can't go without me The bus is very crowded. A man tries to get on, but no one gives way to him. "Hey, let me get on the bus." the man shouts. "It's too crowded. You'd better take the next bus." a passenger says to him. "But you can't go without me. I'm the driver." the man says. 没有我你们走不了 公共汽车上很拥挤.一位男士想上车,但是没有人给他让路.

英语小笑话(带翻译)).

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100个经典冷笑话大全爆笑

2、一次五岁的儿子问我,我手上拿着的东西是什么,我说是手机,他说为什么叫手机那,我那时正忙就随口唱到“左手一只鸡,右手一只鸭。”儿子露出更加疑惑的表情:“那为什么不叫手鸭那?” 3、我和朋友走到分岔路口,我们以歌作别:“我送你离开,千里之外。”于是,“千里之外”就走了。 4、我家母狗生了两只小狗,因为老婆是新闻记者,所以我们戏称这两只狗为“狗仔队”,一次我们正要kiss,我突然看见“狗仔队”大喊:“狗仔队!”老婆惊吓道:“在哪,不可能,我让他们回去了啊。”关注萌宠逗你乐微信公众号mengchong321 每天接收最新最热门最搞笑的笑话! 5、朝鲜说美国人民生活在水深火热中。朝鲜报首版头条,发表的一张美国人爬在海滩上日光浴的照片,配文:美国人很穷,没有衣服穿,吃不饱饭,人都饿死了,也没人管...... 6、一MM失恋了,几次欲寻短见都被亲友及时发现未能实现。一日趁亲友不备离家出走,急的亲友到处寻找,就在决定报警时,收到她发来的短信:你们不必找我了,我在去往死海的路上,我喜欢大海,我决定在那儿结束我的人生。

7、嫦娥姐姐在吃饭,突然外面一闪,嫦娥一惊,连忙出去看。回来呼了一口气;“杨利伟。。” 8、阿钜和菲菲都耳背。那天菲菲看阿钜出门;“阿钜,你去散步?”“不是啊,我去散步啊!”“哦。。我以为你去散步呢。” 9、阿钜和菲菲商量好走楼梯到他们50层的家。到了10楼,阿钜问菲菲;“菲菲你累了吗?”菲菲摇摇头,他们就继续走。到了30楼,阿钜问菲菲:“菲菲你累了吗?”菲菲摇摇头,他们就继续走。到了49楼,阿钜问菲菲:“菲菲你累了吗?”菲菲使劲点头。阿钜:“那好,我们走回去乘电梯到家吧。” 10、阿钜要考试,妈妈问阿钜书看完了吗?阿钜说:“我看完了。”第二天妈妈看到阿钜不及格的卷子大发雷霆,“你书都看了为什么考这么差!”阿钜:“妈妈,我那天说的是。。。我看,完了。” 11、农夫山泉,有点虫。新闻发布会:关于农夫山泉有点虫的问题,是这样的,我们不生产矿泉水的,我们只是大自然的搬运工。这个嘛,是人人皆知的,在我们的广告中早有声明。既然是大自然,就会有虫虫,大自然如果没有虫虫,那还是大自然吗?最后,祝福大自然越来越美,虫虫多多益善! 12、儿子经常在睡觉前喜欢让妈妈给自己讲故事,听着听着就会慢慢睡着。一天,妈妈外出不在,他就让爸爸给讲,爸爸

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