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文秘英语论文

文秘英语论文
文秘英语论文

Learn to Listen — The Key to Effective Communication

1.Introduction

Most misunderstanding that arises in our daily lives occurs because of poor listening habits. Poor listening skills can create serious personal, professional, and financial problems. From the time we get up in the morning to the time we end the day, we are constantly listening to something. Y et most of us give little thought to the role that listening plays in our everyday experiences. Parents and children both complain, “They don’t listen to me.” A similar refrain may be heard from relationship partners, workers and bosses, teachers and students. Y ou may even hear a friend say to you, “Y ou reall y ought to listen to yourself.” As simple as listening appears to be, many of us are not effective or efficient as listeners.

It may surprise you to realize how much of your waking day you spending listening—when you are not talking or reading, you are probably listening to something or someone. Communication scholar Larry Barker and several colleagues found that college students spend nearly half of their communication time listening, almost one-third of it speaking, and less than one-third of it reading and writing(William J. Seiler & Melissa J. Beall, 2002).

What is listening? Listening is a deliberate process through which we seek to understand and retain aural (heard) stimuli. It depends on a complex set of skills that must be acquired and it requires us to make an active, conscious effort to comprehend and remember what we hear (James M. Lahiff & John M. Penrose, 1997). In our environment, from minute to minute, far too many sounds bombard us for us to be able to pay attention to each one. Thus, in listening, we process the external sounds of our environment to select those that are relevant to us, our activities, and our interests. This is not to say that listening is just an external process. It is also an internal process. We listen to the sounds we hear, and we listen to what others say, but we also listen to what we say aloud and what we say to ourselves in response.

2.The functions of listening

Throughout a whole day we have listened to many different people and things for a variety of purposes. Let’s look at each of these functions in greater detail and the listening skills that each requires.

Listening to obtain information

We probably spend most of your listening time listening for information, that is, listening to gain comprehension. We listen as your teacher discusses process, perception, nonverbal and verbal communication, famous speakers, and similar topics in order to learn about speech skills. Each day we listen for information such as news, weather forecasts, sports scores, directions, orders, assignments, names, numbers, and locations (Katherine Adams & Gloria J. Galanes, 2002). Listening to evaluate

Evaluative listening is listening to judge or to analyze information. For example, a car owner who hears a squeak coming from the front end rolls down the window and does some evaluative listening. That is, the owner tries to pinpoint the exact location and cause of the bothersome noise.

A teacher listens to students’ speeches to discriminate between good and poor presentations and to assign grades. In most situations we all should listen critically. We should constantly judge evidence, arguments, facts, and values. We need to ask questions if we hope to be effective listeners (常乐,2004). We are bombarded by messages asking us to believe, accept, or buy things. For our own protection, we must evaluate everything to which we listen.

Listening with empathy

Empathic listening occurs when you listen to what someone else is expecting and seek to understand that person’s thoughts and feelings. It is not sympathy, which means that you feel sorry for the other person. Empathy means you try to understand what is happening to him or her (Pamela Angell & Teeanna Rizkallah, 2003). Most of us find it difficult to avoid making judgments when we listen to someone else’s problems, but that is exactly what we must do if we hope to listen with empathy. Listening empathically can be a healing and soothing process. Empathic listening indicates that we are aware, appreciative, and understanding of another person’s feelings.

3.The effective listening in communication

3.1 The stages of effective listening

The listening process involves six stages: hearing, selecting, attending, understanding, evaluating, and remembering. Connected to these six stages is the final aspect of responding. Hearing

Hearing is the passive registering of sounds; the ILA definition of listening identifies the first part of the listening process as receiving, which happens when you hear. Y ou may sense the sounds, but you do not allow them to prepare beyond a superficial level (Teri Kwal Gamble & Michael Gamble, 2001). For example, when you play the radio while studying, you hear the music, but are you really listening to it? The radio provides background sounds that become listening only when you also carry out the remaining stages of the listening process.

Selecting

To make sense out of our environment, we must choose which stimuli we will listen to and which we will ignore. This process is called selecting. For example, at a party a friend may be talking to you while loud music is playing and other people are talking. In order to listen to the friend speak, you would select the friend’s voice and ignore the other sounds and stimuli.

Stop reading for a moment, and listen to the sound around you. Notice that while you were reading, you might not have been registering traffic noises, the ticking of a clock, the hum of the refrigerator motor, the sound of someone’s stereo. Selecting one source of sound does not necessarily mean that you are fully listening to it, but it does engage you in the second stage of the listening process.

Attending

Not only must you select what you are going to listen to, but you must also attend to it. Attending is the mental process of focusing or concentrating for a periods of time on specific stimuli that you have selected while ignoring or downplaying other competing, internal or external stimuli. Y our attention span normally ranges from a few seconds to a much longer time period. The more things you notice around you, the less able you will be to concentrate on the single thing and listen to it effectively. Thus, it is important that you attend to the specific stimuli (message, sound) to which you want to listen. Attending to something does take effort and concentration, but this alone does not constitute listening.

Understanding

The main deference between hearing and listening is understanding. Once you have heard, selected, and attended to sounds, you assign meaning to them. Although there is no commonly accepted explanation of how understanding occurs, it is known that past experiences play an important role and that you relate and compare new sounds to those you have heard in the past. To learn calculus, for example, you must first learn algebra. Thus, if you walk into a calculus class unprepared, you can select and attend to what the teacher is saying. But because you are unable to interpret the teacher’s message, you will not understand the material being presented. So even though you may be hearing, selecting, and attending to what the calculus teacher is saying, you are not prepared to understand what is being said. The inability to understand reduces your listening effectiveness.

Evaluating

In the evaluating stage, the listener analyzes evidence, sorts fact from opinion, determines the intent of the speaker, judges the accuracy of the speaker’s statements and conclusions, and judges the accuracy of personal conclusions. Once we begin to assess the message we received and understood, we may no longer hear and attend to other incoming messages.

Remembering

When we say we are listening to someone, we may actually mean that we are playing attention to what is being said (陈文杰,2003). We may not be indicating that we understand the message or that we will remember it. Remembering is thinking of something again. The last aspect in the complete listening process is being able to recall what was said from stored memory.

Unfortunately, many of us do not remember information for long. Why we remember some things and not others is not completely clear. Research beginning in 1931, and since corroborated by the ILA, suggests that we remember approximately half of the newly heard, meaningful information immediately after we hear it, but after a month we initially remembered (Teri Kwal Gamble & Michael Gamble, 2001). Just as our understanding depends on the selecting and attending stages, so too does our memory.

Responding: sending feedback

A receiver who has listened to a message can connect with the sender by verbally or nonverbally verifying the message’s reception or indicating a lack of reception. This verification is referred to as responding or feedback. Responding is the listener’s overt behavior that indicates to

the speaker what has and has not been received. Examples of such behaviors are total silence (didn’t hear the message, ignored the message, or was angry about what the message said), smiling or frowning (agreeing or disagreeing with the message), and asking for clarification of what was received. Giving feedback is an important part of being an affective listener. Feedback helps ensure understanding and also helps speakers determine whether they have been successful in communication.

3.2 Improving listening competence

With appropriate knowledge and practice, all of us can become better listeners. First, we must recognize the importance of listening affectively. Second, we must think of listening as an active behavior that requires conscious participation. Third, we must recognize that a willingness to work and a desire to improve are essential to increase listening effectiveness (戴尔·卡耐基,2007).

In some situations, we need not listen with full attention. For example, if we listen to a CD while conversing with a friend, we’re not likely to create problems by attending closely to the friend and partially to the music. However, each listener must be able to identify when total energy and involvement in the listening process are crucial. Effective listening often requires both energy and concentration; listeners need to constantly remind themselves that listening is vital to communication. People call on different listening skills, depending on whether their goals is to comprehend information, critique and evaluate messages, show empathy for others, or appreciate a performance. According to the National Communication Association, competent listener demonstrate ⑴knowledge and understanding of the listening process, ⑵the ability to use appropriate and effective listening skills for a given communication situation and setting, and ⑶the ability to identify and manage barriers to listening (张弘,李源,2004).

Competent listener work at listening. They are prepared to listen and know what they wish to gain from their listening experiences. Competent listener also engages in appropriate listening behaviors. They know that being a good listener is active and complex. They know that they must pay attention if they are to listen well. They do not interrupt others, they look at the speaker, they listen to ideas, and they concentrate on what is being said.

4. Conclusion

Communication is an important and essential part of our life. As we interact with others on a daily basis, we need effective communication to understand others and make ourselves understood. There are several principles of effective communication, but learning to listen is the key. When we communicate with others, we often think highly of other principles of effective communication and ignore the significance of listening.

This paper made an attempt to analyze the principle of learning to listen in effective communication from two aspects, including the functions of listening and the effective listening in communication. The author’s immature and comparatively subjective analysis of it needs improving later.

Reference

[1].James M. Lahiff & John M. Penrose, 1997, Business Communication: Strategies and Skills, Prentice Hall.

[2].Katherine Adams & Gloria J. Galanes, 2002, Communication in Groups, McGraw-Hill Higher Education.

[3].Pamela Angell & Teeanna Rizkallah, 2003, Buniess Communication Design, the McGraw-Hill Companies.

[4].Teri Kwal Gamble & Michael Gamble, 2001, Communication Works, McGraw-Hill Higher Education.

[5].William J.Seiler & Melissa J.Beall, 2002, Communication: Marking Connections, McGraw-Hill Higher Education.

[6].常乐,2004,高效沟通,中国华侨出版社。

[7].陈文杰,2003,人生难得好人缘,华文出版社。

[8].戴尔·卡耐基,2007,赢得朋友(How To Win Friends And Influence People),学林出版社。

[9].张弘,李源,2004,交际大全,远方出版社。

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